Healing
by Flora-Aurora
Summary: Takes you through Katniss healing from the end of Mockinjay, through to the Peeta Real or not Real scene. Very sweet because we all love Peeta! Post Mockinjay, pre epilogue. Please Read and Review! :
1. Chapter 1

Finnick was right it takes ten times longer to put someone back together than it is to tear them apart. Maybe a hundred times or maybe you just can't put someone back together at all. That's how I feel. I will never be put back together. Ever, ever, ever.

My name is Katniss Everdeen. I repeat again and again till I feel sick. Till the word sound odd, till I doubt my existence.

I deteriorate slowly for about a month, falling into a darkness that I long to engulf me, but there is always a crack of light at the top, I know I will never be free from the burden my life has thrust upon me.

After that frightful month, I realise that what is the point. What is the point of not living my life. But I think of Prim, I feel guilt, would she want me to mourn here over her? Is this what she would want, no. No she wouldn't, she would want me to move on live my life and be free of the capitols burden now they have been brought down. I want to punch myself for not realising this sooner.

Greasy Saes visits become less frequent, for I am hunting myself now, able to provide my own food, though she checks on me sometimes. The first time I went into the woods felt amazing. Freedom washed through me. I felt rejuvenated as I ran shooting arrows through the eyes of many a creature, making beautifully clean kills. It seemed like I had not lost my talents, they were fresh in my mind as if it were yesterday I was out hunting here with Gale.

I had tried to refrain from thinking of Gale too much. It just caused me pain and heartache, for I knew that the chances of him coming back to twelve were second to none. He would be off making a new life for himself somewhere, probably wouldn't be thinking of me, so why should I be thinking of him.

He must have noticed me going out and hunting, he must have noticed me slowly getting better, because one night I hear a knock at my door. I don't get visitors, Haymitch tended to leave me alone until I got better. But I know it's not him, he would probably be under the sleepy haze of all the white liquor he consumes by now. I slowly proceed down the corridor, and open the door. That's when I see him standing there, the boy with blonde hair, the painter, the baker, the boy with the bread. I open the door and he says my name 'Katniss'.

I invite him inside.

Another month passes since the day Peeta came to my door, I never regret letting him in. I think he realises that I still needed a bit of time to heal, he is steady on me. It reminds me of what a wonderful person he truly is so beautiful, caring and considerate. I know he would never do a single thing to hurt me, only protect me.

We work on the book, recording our memories, the pain, the tears, the blood. He paints and bakes, I hunt.

The first time I laugh in months is with Peeta. We are working on our book and he makes a joke about one of the younger bakers at the bakery. Such a simple remark, yet I am laughing, and I realise Peeta has done it, he has fully healed me, I am ready now.

The laughter warms me up and the smile I have on my face seems to be stretching my skin in an unfamiliar way, but I love it, it makes me feel young again. Peeta's smile is radiant too, for he must realise he has completed the seemingly impossible task of making me happy again. Before I know what I am doing I wrap my arms around him and embrace him, he wraps his arms around me too as I turn my face into his neck and revel in the feeling I thought I had lost forever. His soft t-shirt, the smell of freshly baked bread and clean air, the wonderful warm feeling of his skin reminds me of what I have missed. Why I love him.

That night I is late, the fire is blazing in the fireplace, the flames remind me of the past, the girl on fire that I once was. I used to refuse to have fires on in the house because of the painful memories, now I can handle it, now I have Peeta I can handle it. We are sitting by the fire, we are holding hands, and he is looking at me. 'Katniss, I think I better be heading home, it's getting quite late.' He said in his usual soft tone. I realise now completely that he is the only person in my life that really matters. He had braved all for me, and I have never truly realised or appreciated it. Before the games, he loved me, but he was too afraid to talk to me, even then he would have done anything for me. He saved my life and risked his by giving me the bread. During the games, he tried and did everything to save me; every action he made was for my benefit, not his. The quell, again he did everything on my behalf. And then when Snow took him away, he tried to battle through, he kept himself alive knowing that he would be able to get to me again. Though he had been hijacked he made his way through it, dug his wrists into those handcuffs and fought because he loved me, because he never gave up hope on me.

And I had never returned the love he gave to me back. So I decided starting from now, that I would.

'No Peeta, I don't want you to go anymore, please don't leave me again, and stay with me.' I replied. He looked at me with such warmth in his eyes, how could I have ever thought he was out to kill me. He answered 'Of course.'

That night, it felt so incredibly amazing to have his arms wrapped round me again, to be able to have his body so close to me again like all those nights on the train. He was still awake so I turned to face him and looked into his eyes, although darkness was upon us, the clear moonlight illuminated his face and his crystal blue eyes. I leaned in and kissed him. The kiss was sweet and heavenly. I loved him so much. I went in for another kiss and he returned it with passion, I could get lost in this kiss forever, it was beautiful and romantic but also heated. I wrapped myself around him and he wrapped his arms round my neck, pulling my lips closer to his own. My hands were tangled in his blonde curly hair.

As the sun was rising and the sky was a beautiful shade of diluted pink with hints of Peeta's favourite shade of soft, glowing orange, he looked into my eyes and whispered. 'Do you love me, real or not real?'

And I answered, without a shadow of doubt and with all the passion and love in my soul. 'Real.'

(A/N: Thanks so much for reading this. I love the Hunger Games so much and I love Peeta as you can probably tell! It would really help me out if you could review as my stories don't get a lot of reviews and it really makes my day and helps me to write more great fics! I was wondering whether to continue this story, show the rest of Katniss's and Peeta's lives, like when they get married and have their kids, maybe even Gale coming to district 12 again and stuff! Tell me if you would want some more chapters about the rest of their lives in a review or feel free to dm me any suggestions! Once again thanks a lot and have a happy new year! Happy hunger games Grace xxxxx)


	2. Chapter 2

Three weeks have passed since the real or not real moment. Our routines have relaxed a little. Peeta and I spend more and more time together, which I thoroughly enjoy.

Now I know the entirety of love. What I feel with Peeta now is so much stronger than anything I have ever felt before in my life. Our love now is different to the love we had in the games, it was partially doubted and always shadowed with danger and fear. Now, it is free and unrestrained, though pitted with a certain sense of grief, it is real and passionate.

I find it hard to admit to myself how much I love him; I never have been much of an emotional person that would admit to my feelings. But when I see Peeta now, I just can't help smiling; he has saved me from everything. He saved me in the games, through the rebellion, and now has saved me from the loss afterwards.

One day I wake up in Peeta's arms as usual, which is the most wonderful feeling. I will never grow tired or grow used to it, it is so magnificent. His arms are so strong and I feel so safe within them. As I sit up straight and rub my eyes, he stirs. "Good morning, beautiful." I kind of hate and love when Peeta calls me things like this, it makes me feel feminine and loved, but it also makes me feel embarrassed. "What are you planning to do today?" I say as he sits up too and puts his hand on my lap. I hold it between mine. "I don't know, maybe do some baking, as usual, or paint, as usual." He replied. I could tell he was getting slightly tired of the two tasks he usually does, so I decide to let him into my hobby. "How about you come hunting with me, Peeta?" I ask.

"I can't Katniss, not with this leg, it will scare all the game away." He says half-heartedly.

"That doesn't matter Peeta, I'm sure you will get better once we're in there, I just really want you to come with me." I say, almost beg. He needs to get out into the fresh air. The woods are beautiful and I'm sure he will appreciate it. Although District 12 is a lot cleaner and jovial than it used to be. It's still quite seldom. The woods are a place to be free, a place where colours and nature haven't been devoured.

He smiles; he must understand how badly I want him to come. "Ok then, if you say so." He smiles again and it warms my heart up. His smile is beautiful.

I dress, pull on my hunting boots and jacket and grab my game bag. I still have my bow and arrow in the woods after all this time. It just feels so natural to me. There are no threats now, I could store it at home, but I like the sense of running to the woods to retrieve it.

Peeta is downstairs soon enough. He embraces me and gives me a quick kiss on the lips. He has a habit of doing this, but I'm not complaining. "thanks so much for letting me come Katniss, you know it's not easy for me always having to bake for the bakery and the families in town, I rarely get a chance to get outside like I used to when I had less responsibilities." He says to me.

"I really wanted you to come Peeta, honestly." I reassure him.

We venture out of the house into the still slightly sooty air of twelve. We pass a few people as we walk out, they wave and smile at us and we return them. I still don't understand why people in twelve think of me a hero. I was the one whose fault it was for the entire district being bombed, for them losing their families.

The fence is long gone, though not many people go into the woods. I have seen a few women and their children go in. I retrieve my bow from the same old collapsed trunk. I'm glad that it had survived the bombings. Peeta was smiling behind me. "I love seeing you in here Katniss, it's like proper you, like you with no restraints, like the real Katniss."

"I guess that's kind of true."

As I ventured into the woods with Peeta, I couldn't help but comparing this with my times with Gale. Gale and I worked so well together, we would spend the whole day here, hunting, snaring, gathering, collecting for our families. With Peeta it was different; there wasn't a sense of pressure that I had with Gale to provide.

I tried to teach Peeta to shoot with my bow with no prevail. I ran around shooting things down cleanly while he collected some berries. I came back to him with my game bag full. He sighed "Honestly Katniss, you are so amazing at this!" I smiled back at him.

"Come on Peeta, let's go for a walk." I could see Peeta gazing at the beautiful colourings of the leaves and the trees. "I would love to come here one day and paint, Katniss, could we do that?" he asked me. "Of course we can, Peeta, its lovely here isn't it?"

"Not as lovely as you." another highly embarrassing comment but with a slight sense of enjoyment.

We came to a glade scattered with little lilac flowers. I could see he was getting a bit tired from walking so I sat down on the soft grass. He did the same. "Were you glad you came, Peeta?" I asked.

"Yeah I am, it's a wonderful place in here, I'm jealous of you for getting to spend most of your life in here." He replied with a smile. I rested my head in his lap and he played with my hair. "You're really beautiful, Katniss."

"Peeta, please stop saying things like that it gets me embarrassed!" I exclaimed! He chuckled to himself. We lay in silence for a few more minutes, until Peeta pulled me up and placed a kiss on my lips and took hold of my hands and looked into my eyes. "Katniss, I just really want to say how much I unconditionally love you, how I will never ever let you out of my reach again and that I will forever love you. You mean everything to me and I could only hope and wish that you feel a fraction of what I feel for you for that would be enough. I have loved you for 13 years and I will for the rest of my life. Katniss, please marry me?"

(A/N: Hope you liked it, next chapter they will get married in true district 12 style! Then in chapter 4, I think Gale will come back, but don't worry he won't cause any trouble! I like Gale anyway. Once again thanks for reading, please review they really put a smile on my face! Grace xx


	3. Chapter 3 The Wedding

It was a simple affair. We needed nothing more, nothing less. It was perfect in both our eyes.

The wedding was only two weeks after Peeta proposed to me. We didn't feel rushed at all though. We were both ready and its seemed silly to wait. Also, it wasn't as if the wedding needed malicious planning. We both agreed that it was definitely not going to be a huge affair. I preferably wanted for it just to be us two, no guests. Peeta obviously was the rational one, convincing me that inviting my mother to watch the ceremony was necessary. She had been through enough pain, and I guess that missing her only daughter, and only child's wedding, would make her unhappy, and she didn't need that.

Obviously, Haymitch had realised that Peeta and I were to be wed, and practically invited himself. He demanded to be invited. He obviously does not want to admit it, but I know he cares about us a lot, and this is a big moment of our lives he would like to be part of.

Fair enough we did know other people, but these two were the only exceptions I had made. It was rushed and we just wanted to get married, that was all, not be made a fuss of. We would have invited Effie, but I know she would have probably brought in a camera crew and organised the whole things for us. Organisation was her forte I suppose.

I simply could not invite Gale. I am still unsure whether I wanted him to be there or not. He killed my sister, but he was my best friend. He loved me and I am marrying another man. The cons seemed to outweigh the pros, I decided against it. I'm sure I will see Gale again one day, maybe when his wounds aren't as fresh. I couldn't deal with seeing him now.

My mother came down on the train from District 4, the day before I was to be married. I was happy to see her, even more so when I realised she was in good health, and fairly happy too. It was unnecessary for her to come any earlier, it would be uncomfortable for her in twelve, and it's not as if the wedding needed any major preparation. She seemed incredibly excited that I was getting married, this made me happy. After what she had been through she deserved something like this.

The evening before the wedding, my mother had retired to bed, and Peeta and I were saying our goodbyes. Peeta had decided to stay at his house for the first time in months. He said it was because I needed to get ready and things in the morning. I deemed this as highly unnecessary, but he said the first time he wanted to see me tomorrow was at the wedding. He hesitated at the door for a moment, and then exclaimed 'oh Katniss, I forgot!' He walked over to me, and kissed me.

'I just wanted you to have one last kiss as Miss Katniss Everdeen.' I giggled to myself as I pondered upon the prospect, as Peeta smiled and walked out the door.

I had to admit to myself, it was quite amazing, but also quite frightening that tomorrow, I would be Mrs Katniss Mellark. I loved that a part of Peeta would be in my name, so people knew that I was married to him. But Katniss Everdeen has been my name throughout all my life, through the games, the horrors. It was my father's name, and I will be sad to let it go, but being Mrs Mellark made me contently happy.

Peeta had made a fuss when I said I didn't want an engagement ring. I honestly did not want one, only a simple wedding band I felt was necessary. I admire Peeta for his kindness and generosity; he was practically begging to get one for me. I guess he wanted to spoil me. He is really more than I will ever deserve.

I found it hard to get to sleep that night without him by me. It just didn't feel natural to sleep alone anymore, but I eventually drifted off.

I woke up and it was a beautifully cool, crisp and clear day. The sky was that beautiful shade of powder blue, and soft, white clouds scattered upon it. It was perfect. My mother bustled in when she realised my stirring with some peppermint tea and some hot grain flavoured with honey. I ate while she sat on the foot on the bed, chattering on about how excited she was and how happy Prim and my father would be. I could hear her voice slightly cracking when she said this; I realised and swiftly moved onto a different topic.

When I was done, I washed. I will be honest, I felt nervous, when I really shouldn't have. I didn't even know why I was nervous. Peeta is the best person in the world and I love him so much I should not doubt anything.

When I came out of the shower, my mother pounced on me and forced me to sit down so she could do my hair. I loved it when my mother did my hair, she never pulled, and she was so gentle. I guess it was the 'healer's hands', which I sadly had not inherited. I said to do whatever style she wanted, I had no real preference. She braided it, so two braids were going round my head, then pinned the braids at the bottom; the rest of my hair was tumbling down in soft waves. I had to admit that I really liked it, and I knew Peeta would too. He liked my hair best when it was down.

I simply could not wear one of the many wedding dresses Cinna had left behind. Although they were beautiful, they were made under Snows orders, and I didn't want that, also I wanted something very simple. I did want to acknowledge Cinna through my dress though, he had captured such beauty with the dresses, and I know he would have loved to make my real wedding dress. So, instead, I had the dresses sent over to my mother, and she had used the fabric to create my dress.

I put on the dress. It was simple, yet slightly elegant. It was made of a white silk. A simple scooped neckline, it fell to the floor very naturally. The skirt was floaty and the sleeves were simple, made of a chiffony fabric. The sleeves fell to my elbows. I looked incredibly beautiful, especially with my hair.

My mother started crying, she composed herself enough to bring out a small headdress of flowers out. I realised that the headdress mainly consisted of primroses. 'She would have wanted to have been part this Katniss, she so loved it when you tried on all those dresses.' My mother sobbed. I felt a pang in my heart and felt my eyes star to sting slightly, but my mother was right, Prim would have wanted to be here, she would have wanted it to be the happiest day of my life and for me to enjoy it. I kept strong for both her and my mother.

District 12 weddings weren't very spectacular, you would say a few words with the person you loved, sign the marriage papers at the justice building in front of an official who would consolidate the marriage, and then go home to do the toasting. After the bombings, there was no Justice Building, so we had pretty much free reign over where we wanted the ceremony to be held. We decided to just go on the outskirts of the forest, in the meadow. It was beautiful there, and it's where Peeta asked me to marry him. Also it wasn't actually in the forest; it was right on the side of the seam, so it was easily accessible.

My mother and I walked into the meadow, and I saw Peeta and Haymitch there, chatting happily to the district official who would be carrying out the ceremony. Haymitch looked round when he heard me approach and so did Peeta. It made me want to cry and laugh all at the same time when I saw the look on his face, it was adoration, love, shock, just everything. My mother and I slowly strolled up to them. Two arrangements of wild flowers had been set out, and a large, upturned tree trunk had been assembled with the marriage papers atop. "You look beautiful, sweetheart." said Haymitch. I smiled at him, but I had to instantly avert my gaze to Peeta. He was wearing a beige coloured jacket and trousers, with a simple white button down shirt. It was simple yet pleasantly beautiful, like my dress. I could see tears coming to his eyes, I urged myself not to cry as well. "You look so beautiful, Katniss." he sighed. "Should we begin?" asked the Official. Both Peeta and I nodded.

What the man was saying was only a small voice in the back of my mind as I gazed into Peeta's eyes. All I really recall is repeating the words he told me to and Peeta doing the same. I just couldn't stop looking at him and thinking after all the hell we have been through, we have made it. Defied the odds, maybe they were in our favour after all. He asked if Peeta would present me with a ring, he pulled it out of his pocket. It was a simple silver band, with a small pearl in the middle. I recognised it, it was the pearl Peeta gave to me in the quell, what I held on to when he had been hijacked, the token of love that got me through. I smiled as he slid it on my finger. By this time my mother was sobbing and I'm pretty sure I heard Haymitch sniffing slightly.

He pronounced us man and wife. Peeta kissed me and I held on to him, maybe for slightly longer than necessary. We both had the hugest smiles on our faces. We signed the papers and our marriage was officiated.

Peeta and I walked hand in hand down to my house. Many residents of twelve stood on their doorsteps and waved, we returned them and smiled. Peeta kissed me again and lots of people clapped. Trust him to make a scene. I did enjoy it though, I think I was the happiest I had ever been in my life and I couldn't deny Peeta a bit of attention.

We got to my house. In twelve, you weren't properly married till you had done the toasting. I asked my mother and Haymitch if we could be alone whilst doing so. The toasting was quite a private thing. They agreed and my mother and Haymitch went outside to look at Haymitch's geese.

We sat in front of the fire. Peeta lit the fire and I poked the coals till the fire was a slow, flickering orange flame. The good thing about your new husband being a baker is that you will definitely have bread for the toasting! He sat down with the bread before taking his hand in mine. "Katniss, I love you so, so, so much, you don't even understand. It's immeasurable. I never have had any doubts about my love for you. We have been through hell, and I have continued to love you even then. I promise to do nothing ever again to hurt you; I will always love you even after we have passed on. Every single possible minute I want to spend with you. Today was the best day of my life." He took my face into his hands and kissed me deeply. It was now my turn to talk, "Peeta, I know that I find it hard to convey my feelings and that I rarely tell you what I'm feeling. I just want you to know that this was the best day of life as well. I love you too much. I know Haymitch was right when he said I could live a thousand lifetimes and not deserve you. You are beautiful, and you saved me from everything. I always loved you, though I found it hard to realise. I will love you forever Peeta Mellark." We kissed again, the fire growing to a red inferno, the flames ferocious. I poked the fire a few more times to tend it back to the orange flame. The girl on fire was most definitely gone now. Peeta and I both held the fork on which the bread was toasting, his hand on top of mine. Once the bread was a crisp and golden brown, we shared it together. It was such a simple act, yet it meant so much in our district, sharing such a staple thing together with the one that holds you to the ground, that you love unconditionally.

I was now officially Katniss Mellark, and I absolutely loved it.

(A/N: Ok, so I hoped you liked it. I know I said that Gale would come in on this chapter, but I thought it would ruin the romance, I really wanted to concentrate on the wedding, and I thought that Gale would kind of ruin the wedding. So Gale is coming in next chapter hopefully, so we can see his reaction to Katniss's marriage!

I found it quite difficult to describe the wedding because the wedding ceremonies in twelve are all very vague in the descriptions, so I just kind of made it up.

Anyway, I hoped you liked it! It would absolutely make my day if you reviewed to tell me what you thought, and even ideas for future chapters and storylines. Please feel free to pm if you have anything you would like to say about the story! Thanks, and may the odds be ever in your favour! Grace xx


	4. Chapter 4

It must have been one of the happiest times in my life. The next few weeks after the weekend were so wonderful because they were so blissfully normal. I would go out and hunt, he would bake. But now I was Mrs Mellark. When I went to trade to some merchants in the square, they offered their congratulations to both me and Peeta, this made me feel slightly embarrassed but unbelievably happy. My mother had returned home to her district a few days after the wedding, wanting to leave us alone. She did need to get on with her duties at the hospital anyway, even after rebellions and Hunger Games, there are still people to treat.

One day, something did strike me that woke me up from this hazy happiness of marriage. It was a typical evening, Peeta and I were at our home and we had Greasy Sae round for dinner. We had been doing this frequently in order to repay her for the countless days she had cared and cooked for me, it only seemed right to return the favour.

We had finished eating a delicious stew Peeta had made, with fresh bakery bread, and Sae and I were talking about everything and nothing whilst Peeta was with Saes young granddaughter. I caught him sitting with her and laughing out of the corner of my eye.

He was sitting with her, making flowery and swirly shapes out of the coloured yarn my mother had left behind. Peeta would make a wonderful pattern, and then she would make her own. Peeta would always commend her on her efforts, and tell her how wonderful and pretty it was. She tired easily of activities, so then Peeta took to drawing the little girl cats and dogs on little pieces of paper that she could colour in. It was hilarious to see Peeta's exact drawings being scribbled on haphazardly by a young child. He seemed to be enjoying watching and making conversation with her about the kind of dog she would like.

I looked at them making conversation, laughing, playing, and understood how much Peeta wanted this. Maybe not now, but soon, he will want a child. He looked so content with her, so happy. Could I do this for him? Could I possibly bring a child into the world after all that has happened? I don't even know if I could bring up a child, I am not very maternal in most respects.

But, it would make Peeta so happy, he wants this so bad, and I know he would be the most amazing father, I would not be doing this alone, and he would be right by me the whole way. Haymitch is right, I don't deserve him. I will never deserve him.

Greasy Sae and her granddaughter left, leaving Peeta and I alone. He hugged me and smiled, I smiled back. The words came out too fast from my mouth, before I even knew I was saying them, "Peeta, do you want children, because... because, I don't think I'm ready just yet." I guess that all I could think about at the time was Peeta and children, and felt like I needed to clear my mind of my paranoia.

"Katniss, of course I want children with you, and I fully understand you are not ready yet. I wouldn't even care if you didn't want any children; I would still stay with you forever as long as it made you completely and utterly happy. Having a baby with you would mean the complete world to me and I would wait as long as you needed Katniss, I hope you realise this." Peeta replied.

I must admit, relief did wash over me slightly when he said this. I don't even know why I was so worried in the first place, of course he would say something like this, because he is the most perfect, wonderful, thoughtful person in the world, and he would never do anything to hurt me, or make me sad in a million years.

The next few weeks went by as usual again, with no mentions of our 'family'. I knew Peeta would not mention it unless I had mentioned it previously. He knew it made me uncomfortable and that I'd rather not talk about it.

It was a Tuesday, and one of the most shocking and unexpected days of my life. I had just got home from my daily hunt. I had a deer, which was lucky; you didn't get many around this time of year. I also had a couple of wild turkeys and squirrels, which I was sure I would be able to sell off at the market place. Many people could afford to buy meat now, and I usually charged relatively cheaply.

I was setting my game bag on the table, and removing my hunting jacket. Peeta was out at the bakery, so the house was eerily quiet. As I was going to make my way upstairs, I heard a knocking at the door. It was strange, most people were out working at this time of day, and Peeta and I rarely got visitors. Who could it be? I travelled back down the stairs, and down the hallway. I slowly pulled the heavy oak door open, and stood, positively shocked at whom was standing in the doorframe, giving me a shy half-smile.

It was Gale.

(A/N: So sorry I haven't updated in quite a while! I've been very busy with school work and stuff like that as I am sure many of you can understand! I hope you have enjoyed this chapter anyway. Please review and tell me what you think as it truly does make my day! Also, I was thinking if writing a fic on a previous hunger games, with characters that you guys have submitted, tell me what you think and whether you would be interesting in creating a character/characters! Once again thank you for reading and May the odds be ever in your favour! Grace xx


	5. Chapter 5

Panic, it surged through me and made me stay rooted to the spot whilst I tried to figure out what to do. I wasn't even aware at this point that Gale was just staring at me whilst saying 'Katniss?' in a concerned voice.

He killed my sister, he killed Prim, and I repeated this in my mind again and again while I tried to figure out what to do. It must have been about thirty seconds of me doing this before I pushed past him, slammed my door and sprinted through the victor's village and down the lane to the square.

As I ran, and eventually slowed down to a gentle jog, I tried to rationalize what I had done. I knew I would have said something very, very stupid if I had said something to Gale. I was not ready to face him yet, even though it had been months since all the disasters had happened. And why was he even here? What if something bad has happened again? Maybe it was just to try to make amends, I didn't even know if I was ready for that yet. Another worry that jetted across my mind whilst I was running was what Gale was going to think when he found out Peeta and I were now married! Maybe that would be too much for him to take.

Luckily, I knew where I was heading when I took of sprinting; I was heading straight to the bakery. Peeta would know what to do; he was usually good and rational in such situations as this, me, not so much. I slowed down slightly when I got to the main square; people were giving me strange looks because of my panting and panicked expression. I briskly walked into the door of the bakery, thankful that no one was in there, and hopped behind the counter and into the main bakery, where Peeta was working. "Katniss, what are you doing here!"

"Sorry Peeta, it's just... it's just..." I was having trouble putting into words what had just happened, it still seemed very surreal. "What's the matter, Katniss?" He looked genuinely concerned now and I didn't want to cause him too much worry, so I decided to spit it out. "Peeta, it's Gale, he's in district twelve. I had just got back from hunting and I was in the house when I heard a knock at the door, so I went and answered it and he was just there, right outside! I didn't know what to do so I just ran here! I don't even know where he is now; he could be in the square Peeta! I don't know what to do! Should I even talk to him, and how am I meant to tell him we're married!" My mind was going into overdrive and I was panicking, luckily Peeta calmed me down. "Katniss, don't worry, we'll figure something out." He pulled me into his arms and we held each other whilst I tried to gain some composure. "Katniss, lets both go home, and we can figure out what to do, ok?"

"Yeah ok, that's a good idea" I replied. Peeta quickly packed away his baking materials, and we held hands and walked back to the victor's village. We turned the corner and what I had been dreading was unfortunately there. Gale was still standing outside the house, he had clearly been waiting. I looked at Peeta and he whispered "What do you want t do, Katniss?"

I realised what I had to do. Gale and I had history, so much it could probably fill a book, and you can't just erase history, you have to accept it in order to move on and make more. I said to Peeta "Just go inside, I need to do this myself."

"Are you sure Katniss," I cut him off.

"I'm very sure Peeta, I can handle it, if something bad happens, I'll just come inside ok?" he nodded and proceeded inside, letting go of my hand. He didn't even look at Gale as he went through the front door. I trudged towards Gale, he did the same and we eventually met in the middle. There was a good five seconds of silence; we didn't know who would make the first move. Who would break the ice? Eventually, Gale spoke, I wasn't sure what he was going to say, but he just came out with "Katniss, you don't even know how sorry I am, and how much I just want to start again with you." I was relived at what he said, yet still slightly worried, because now it was my turn to speak, and I still didn't really know what to say. Everything was different now; nothing will ever be the same with Gale again. "I know, Gale, I'm just not sure about things anymore, with you I mean. I'm not sure what I meant to do with you or how I am meant to feel about you anymore."

"I understand Katniss, I fully understand, if you want me to leave now just ask, and I will not hesitate."

"No Gale, I don't want you to leave right now, we have to talk through this, or we will have unfinished business it will never be over." I didn't know what I had just said to put the strange expression on Gales face, until I realised I had been nervously twiddling with my wedding ring. "Wait, you are marr..." I cut him off.

"Yes, I am now married to Peeta, and I would like you to simply respect that Gale."

"No, it's not like that Katniss, I'm happy for you." I now realised how hostile and cold I was being towards Gale. He didn't deserve this tone; he hadn't done anything wrong just yet. It seemed like he was only here to make amends, I had now realised this. "God, I'm sorry Gale. I panicked when I saw you to be honest with you. I just didn't know what to do. It's been almost a year since I last saw you, since... that happened. Gale, I realise Prim is gone now, and she is not coming back, she is never coming back. She died for the rebellion, she died for me, and she died for the freedom of Panem. I will never forget her of course, but I have put her to rest both physically and in my mind." It was hard not to allow my voice to shake as I spoke those words.

"I understand Katniss. What I did was unforgiveable, but it had a purpose. It was for the rebellion. I realised that you wouldn't be able to take seeing me for a while, I just didn't know when was the right time to come and see you, if any. I thought it would be best if I came now, just to say to you that I was sorry and I wanted you to forgive me. I have to go back to my district though Katniss, I just wanted to clear the air between us. I'm sorry that this is brief, but I don't think we should dwell on things too much. I just wanted to see you again I guess. "

"Thank you Gale, it means a lot to know that you wanted to make amends, and I agree- you do have to go back to your district. You have business there now. I'm sure this won't be the last we see of each other. It definitely won't be." I actually smiled up at him, he smiled back.

"I'm glad we sorted this Katniss, but it's best I go. Goodbye, Katniss Everdeen."

"Goodbye, Gale Hawthorne, and its Katniss Mellark now, just for future reference." It felt good to joke around with him a bit, yet I felt slightly guilty when I saw his face show a glimmer of sadness. He turned and started walking down the lane, he turned and waved and I waved back, a sense of relief washing through me. One more thing checked off, I thought. Gale and I were now neutral. The slate wiped clean. The air cleared.

I sighed and inhaled the district 12 air and made my way back into the house, both sad and happy. I was right, now Gale and I weren't entangled in our past histories and problems, we were now free to start making things right.


	6. Chapter 6

As soon as I shut the door he hurried down the corridor and enveloped me in an embrace. "Katniss are you okay, what did he say?"

"Its fine Peeta, it's absolutely fine. Look, let's sit down and I'll tell you everything." I don't know why I was using this reassuring tone. I knew that if Peeta knew something bad could happen he wouldn't have let me go out there, let alone let me out of his sight.

We proceeded into the lounge and we sat down on the couch. I told him everything, what I had said to Gale and what he had said to me. Relief seemed to wash over his face. "So that was it Katniss? All he said. I don't even know why we got so panicked about it in the first place." He gives me a heart-warming smile. "Yeah, I know, he pretty much straight away took a train back to two, I didn't go into details, but I guess he's happy back there, has a good job and that." I reply.

"I'm sure he is Katniss." He again gives me that smile. "Do you want to get the book out and work on it for a bit?" I smile and give him a nod. He reaches up to a top shelf and pulls it down. It's pretty full now, the book has thickened out and it gives us great satisfaction to flick through the pages and see them adorned with pictures in rich colours and my tiny print, listing each and every detail. The way Rue stood; about to take flight, the way Prim had such affections for Buttercup, the way my mother healed those with even the most severe ailments. It was all in there, so we would never forget.

We sat down on the floor together next to the fire. He opened the book and it fell open on a page where on opposite pages, there was a picture of my family and his. He looked at it. I know it must be hard for him, all of his family is gone, and at least I have a mother. I too looked at the pictures, a mother, father and children. Could mine and Peeta's family be on the next page? Was this what he was thinking? I didn't know how to react so I quickly skipped the book forward to a new blank page. I guess he noticed that I was flustered slightly, so he instantly asked me what was wrong. I knew that honesty was the best policy with him, especially since we were now married. We should have no secrets; we should speak our minds to each other, so I did.

"Peeta, I was just thinking about children again. I know you want a family and sometimes I want one too, but I don't know when or how I will ever be ready. I understand that now our world and life is safe, our children would not be brought into a world like we were. I don't even know if I will be a good mother. You of course will be an amazing father; because that's the kind of things you are good at. But me, I'm a hunter; I don't know if I could be a mother?"

"Katniss, please, you would be an incredible mother, I have no doubt about it. But I would rather have children when we are ready, when you are completely ready. I mean, we have only been married around six months, were both only nineteen. Even though we have enough love to go round a whole family, we want to do this when we are ready."

Once again he is overly reassuring. He is everything I need, everything I am not, sensitive, thoughtful, careful, kind. We balance each other out, we neutralise into something comfortable and natural.

I lean over to kiss him; I put my arms around his neck and pull him closer as he wraps his arms around my waist. I smile into the kiss and stroke his face as I pull away to look into his eyes-those beautiful, crystalline blue eyes that entrance me every time. "I love you, Peeta."

"I love you, Katniss."

We resumed kissing and I thought to myself, whatever the future may hold, I don't even care what happens, because I will be doing it with him, my boy with the bread, my Peeta.

A/N: Hey guys! Sorry this is like a filler chapter because next chapter I will probably skip a few years and have them thinking about children properly! Once again I hope you liked it, please review as it makes my day!


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